Facing the Unknown: Common Fears About Starting EMDR Therapy (And Why You're Not Alone)

Starting therapy can be a big step. Starting a therapy like EMDR…well, that can feel like a giant leap into unfamiliar territory. If you’re considering EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) and feeling a little (or a lot) nervous, you're in good company. Many of our clients come in with questions, hesitation, and even fear - and that’s completely normal.

So let’s talk about it. Here are some of the most common fears I hear about EMDR - and some gentle reassurance to help you feel a bit more grounded as you explore this powerful healing method.

1. “I’m afraid it’s going to make things worse.”

This is probably the most common fear. If you’ve spent years trying not to think about certain memories, the idea of bringing them up - on purpose - can feel terrifying. You might wonder, Will I fall apart? Will I be able to function afterward?

Here’s the truth: EMDR doesn’t force you to relive trauma in the way you might expect. You don’t have to share every detail out loud. And it’s paced carefully, with lots of tools to help you stay grounded. In fact, the goal of EMDR is to make those memories less distressing, so they stop running the show behind the scenes.

2. “What if I can’t do it right?”

You might worry you won’t “do EMDR correctly,” especially if you're used to overthinking or putting pressure on yourself to perform (hello, perfectionism!).

The good news: There’s no perfect way to do EMDR. Your brain already knows how to hea - EMDR just helps it do that more efficiently. Your therapist is there to guide you every step of the way, and there’s nothing you can “mess up.” This is a collaboration, not a test.

3. “I don’t want to lose control.”

Many people fear feeling emotionally overwhelmed, crying in session, or not being able to “keep it together.” Especially if you’re used to being the strong one, vulnerability might feel scary or even unsafe.

Let me reassure you: EMDR is not about breaking you down - it’s about helping you feel more in control of your internal world. The process includes building in safety, stability, and calm before diving into the deeper work. You’ll always have the option to slow down or pause if needed.

4. “It sounds kind of... weird.”

Right?! Waving fingers, tapping, eye movement - EMDR can sound a bit strange at first. And that’s okay! If you’re a logical or analytical thinker, it’s natural to feel skeptical.

But here’s the thing: EMDR is actually one of the most well-researched trauma therapies out there. And once you try it, the mechanics usually fade into the background. What matters is how you feel during and after - calmer, lighter, freer.

5. “What if I uncover something I didn’t know was there?”

You might worry about uncovering buried memories or feelings you’re not ready for. That’s a valid fear - and it speaks to how deeply you care for yourself and your own safety.

EMDR doesn’t push your brain to reveal more than it’s ready for. Your system is incredibly wise. A skilled therapist will move at a pace that respects your inner capacity and ensures you have the support you need.

Here’s What I Want You to Know:

Fear is a normal part of starting anything new - especially something as intimate and transformative as therapy. EMDR can bring up discomfort, but it can also bring clarity, peace, and emotional freedom you may not have thought was possible.

You don’t have to go through the process alone, and you don’t have to be “ready” in some perfect, fearless way to begin.

All you need is a little curiosity, a willingness to explore, and the right support.

If you're wondering whether EMDR might be a fit for you - or you just want to talk through some of your concerns - we’re here to help you figure that out, judgment-free.

You deserve healing that feels safe, supportive, and deeply respectful of your pace.

If you're ready to begin this journey with guidance, reach out to us for a free 15-minute consultation to learn more about how we can help you.