Is It Anxiety or Is It Stress? Understanding the Difference—and How IFS Therapy Can Help

We’ve all had days when everything feels like too much. Maybe you’ve felt your chest tighten before a big meeting, or you’ve stayed awake at night running through your to-do list over and over. But when these feelings start to interfere with your sense of peace, it can be hard to tell: Is this just stress? Or is it something deeper like anxiety?

Though anxiety and stress are often used interchangeably, they’re not quite the same. Understanding the difference can be an important step toward getting the support you need and finding more clarity and calm in your daily life.

Let’s explore what sets them apart, how they overlap, and how Internal Family Systems (IFS) therapy can help you navigate both with compassion and confidence.

Stress vs. Anxiety: What’s the Difference?

At their core, both stress and anxiety are responses to perceived challenges or threats. But the source and pattern of those responses differ in important ways.

Stress: A Response to External Pressure

Stress typically comes from something outside of you—a looming deadline, financial strain, relationship tension, or a packed schedule. It’s your body and brain’s way of rising to meet a challenge, and in small doses, it can actually help you focus and perform (ever heard of the term “good stress?”) But when the demands exceed your capacity to cope, stress becomes chronic and draining.

Common signs of stress:

• Feeling overwhelmed or irritable

• Muscle tension or headaches

• Trouble sleeping

• Racing thoughts

• Short temper or emotional outbursts

• Digestive issues

The key thing about stress? Once the external pressure eases, the symptoms usually subside.

Anxiety: A Persistent Inner State

Anxiety isn’t always tied to a specific trigger. It’s often more internal and can linger long after a stressor is gone. You might feel anxious without knowing exactly why—or find yourself imagining worst-case scenarios, even when things seem “fine.”

Common signs of anxiety:

• Constant worry or dread

• Intrusive thoughts

• A sense of impending danger

• Avoiding certain situations

• Difficulty concentrating

• Physical symptoms like rapid heartbeat or shortness of breath

Anxiety can feel like stress that never shuts off. And it can leave you stuck in loops of fear or self-doubt that feel hard to break out of, no matter how “together” things look on the outside.

So…Which One Am I Dealing With?

Sometimes, the line between stress and anxiety is blurry, especially if you’re used to pushing through, staying busy, or minimizing your own needs. Here are a few reflective questions to help you sort it out:

• Is there a clear trigger for how I’m feeling?
  If yes, it might be stress. If no, or if the feeling persists despite things going “okay,” anxiety might be present.

• Does the feeling go away when the situation changes?
  Stress usually improves once the pressure is lifted. Anxiety tends to stick around or even latch onto new worries.

• Is my nervous system constantly “on”?
  If you feel wired, jumpy, or on edge most of the time, that may point toward anxiety.

• Am I being hard on myself for feeling this way?
  Harsh self-talk, perfectionism, or people-pleasing often come along with anxiety. Stress might show up more as irritability or exhaustion.

• Do I feel safe in my body right now?
  If the answer is no, even in calm moments, IFS therapy can be especially helpful.

How IFS Can Help You Understand What’s Really Going On

At EMPWR Transformative Therapy, one of the primary approaches we use is Internal Family Systems (IFS)—a powerful, compassionate model that helps you explore the different “parts” of yourself with curiosity and care.

Rather than labeling you as “an anxious person” or “just stressed,” IFS helps you slow down and ask:

What part of me is feeling overwhelmed right now? What does it need? What’s its hope for me?

In IFS, we all have an internal system made up of parts—some carry worry, some try to keep things under control, and some shut down when things feel too overwhelming. These parts aren’t bad or broken. They’ve often developed in response to stress or trauma and are working hard to protect you in the best way they know how. There are no bad parts, but some may be in bad roles.

When you’re stressed, you might notice a part that feels pressure to keep everything together. When you’re anxious, you might find a part that’s constantly scanning for danger or imagining worst-case scenarios.

With the support of a trained IFS therapist, you can:

• Identify which parts are activated

• Learn how these parts developed and what they’re trying to protect

• Offer compassion to overwhelmed or fearful parts

• Reconnect with your core Self—your calm, grounded, all-knowing inner leader

This work doesn’t just help you feel better in the moment—it helps you understand yourself in a deeper way so that you can respond to challenges with more resilience, clarity, and self-trust.

You Don’t Have to Figure It Out Alone

Whether you’re navigating chronic stress, underlying anxiety, or a mix of both, your experience is valid and you deserve support that meets you where you are.

IFS therapy can help you gently untangle the inner dynamics contributing to your distress, without shame or quick fixes. Instead of pushing through or trying to silence your symptoms, you can begin to truly listen to the parts of you that are struggling and find new ways to support them.

If you’re curious about IFS, or wondering whether what you’re feeling is anxiety, stress, or something else entirely—we’re here to help. Our team specializes in working with women who want deep healing, real clarity, and sustainable change.

If you’re ready to explore therapy that honors all parts of you—especially the ones that feel overwhelmed or unsure—reach out to us today. We’d be honored to join you on a journey of healing.